satans-fabulous-blog: morphingly: brightredkettle: are you the SAT because i’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes with a ten minute break halfway through for snacks That’s the most reasonable pick up line I’ve ever heard. You’re hired.
Guy: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
Me: No, but I did scrape my knees when I crawled up from hell.
soundsofluvmakin: Chris Brown - Wet the Bed
snazziest: I’m reading your palm and it says it belongs on my butt
otterparade: cityofbadass: Do you ever wonder about how an author would describe you in a novel? Not only your appearance but the way you talk and laugh and hold yourself and all the expressions on your face? “And then there’s this asshole”
“You stole a kiss. And stole my heart....
eisenburrito: when i find myself in times of trouble robert pattinson comes to me speaking words of wisdom “my favorite animal would definitely be an elephant. because, well, it’s not just a pet. you can lie under it and it’s basically a house.”
When you truly start to care about someone you become vulnerable to all sorts of...– Neal Shusterman, Bruiser (via simply-quotes)